you took then to a doctor, either through frustration, or Brain C-13 Review because someone said you should, and he referred you to a specialist, who tested your child. And now you have the lovely diagnosis of Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), and maybe a prescription for some drugs. But you have no idea what to do from here.
Unfortunately, for most children, that's not the case. People with true cases of ADD have an altered brain chemistry, and an altered brain functioning. Some drugs will help to normalize that, but it is rarely a cureall. Most people who are both successful and have ADD have either trained themselves, or been trained by others in how to partially compensate for and work with their nonnormal brain functioning. Additionally, a host of other learning defects will often (but not always) accompany ADD. These may include, dyslexia, dysgraphia, handeye coordination issues, and others. Add to all of this the feelings of guilt, shame, and being "less than" that come from everyone being frustrated at you, and at your frustration at yourself, and you have a powerful combination for setting someone on the track to fail in life. (Many people with moderate to severe cases of ADD end up in prison.)
When I was diagnosed with ADD, my parents had several choices. They could have ignored the problem, and attempted to pretend that they had a normal boy who was choosing to be bad. They could have clamped down on me harder, and attempted to make me normal through sheer willpower. They could have thrown me at a psychiatrist and washed their hands of it. They could have treated me as a cripple and thrown pity at me. Instead, they did the best thing that they possibly could have for me.
Once my parents learned what was wrong, they changed from my accusers to my advocates overnight. They actively learned about my ADD. They found people who could teach me the skills to help compensate for my altered brain functioning. They found people who could teach me how to study more effectively, and who could use motor training to help me with the hand eye coordination issue that made it very hard for me to write. They worked with the schools to both keep me from drowning, and to keep me challenged. (Because of their work with the schools, I was in both remedial and gifted programs at the same time.) And they got me help in learning how to leverage my strengths.
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